Well I'm ...

Well I'm not very happy right now. I'm still at 146. I have to get down to 135 by April 12th if it's the last thing I do, and I know that I can do this, I have the strength, both mental and physical.It's not the hunger that destroys, it is purely mental desire that messes with you the most in anorexia. the cravings. I find though, that the more I focus on the little details in my life--making my bed and cleaning up after myself and having everything organized, the more control I also have over my eating habits, not to mention that I spend more time on completing those tasks rather than thinking about food.I almost slipped up on my mentality, that of simply being able to tell myself that I don't want a piece of food and that I just am not hungry. But I'm back there now, and I'm determined, so that's all that matters. It'll take me about an hour to get to work, because I figure at some points I'm going to have to remove my skates so I can actually move and/or not get hit by traffic. Car drivers are the worst, I swear. When I worked as a bike courier, that was some mad dangerous stuff, I was almost always in the danger of traffic. Jerks.Oh well. I'm off to work on my web page now, the graphics are always what take the most time. I think I'm going to make this site entirely with layers.